UNDERSTANDING WHAT WOMEN THINK THROUGH FOCUSED GROUP DISCUSSION

Introduction

Women everywhere suffer from many forms of domestic violence and abuse and its consequences are disturbingly far-reaching such that no one can afford to turn a blind eye to it any longer. Regardless of whatever form it takes, the increasing incidence of VAW is taking its toll not only to the women victims and their children but also to the government and to the community as a whole, as shown by increasing costs of government and non-government expenditures on activities related to the treatment of women victims and prevention and monitoring of VAW cases, as well as serious social costs such as disintegration of family relationships, possibly causing rebellious behavior among affected children and higher incidence of crime.

So what can we do to help put an end to this harsh reality?

Knowing women’s opinion on matters that affect them is the first step to addressing the problem of VAW.

To effectively help these women victims, we must first understand how they react when confronted with violence and why they behave in one way or another. It is not unusual for most people to say that the only way to solve the problem of domestic violence is for the abused woman to leave the abuser. Let go of what kills you –a simple survival technique, indeed. But to many battered women, turning their back from an abusive relationship is just not an option, even if it kills them. To get to the bottom of the problem, therefore, their attitudes and decisions must be understood in the context of how they perceive themselves in light of the many societal roles that they perform, or are compelled to perform.

The purpose of the focused group discussion is to aid us in understanding better how women respond to situations involving abuse and violence. Armed with first-hand knowledge and information, we may then be able to provide an adequate and effective assistance to women victims and a workable solution to VAW.

Insights from the FGD

The participants were asked to form several groups. Each group was given a questionnaire. The participants were instructed to discuss with the group their answers to the questions given and to put in writing their proposal on what they think is the best way to end VAW. The leader of each group was asked to present the group’s output.

The questions were basically divided into 4 parts:

i. Determining the participants’ opinion on women’s status in society

Most of the participants focused on the women’s rights and duties as wife and mother. It appears that it is the man who usually makes decisions for the family; he tells the woman what to do and expects her to obey without question, as if she is his possession. There was a general realization among the participants that no essential difference between men and women, however, could indicate that one sex should have more rights, responsibilities and power than the other. Every member of a family is entitled to have autonomy and equal share in family matters. Beatings are never justified.

ii. Evaluation of women’s societal roles

An important point raised is about the common perception that it is the man's right and duty to head the family, so he can do whatever is necessary to keep the woman in line. Some women participants expressed strong feelings about their not being able to do freely what they wish to do. For instance, the abusive husband/partner would usually cut the woman off from the outside world by keeping her from seeing family or friends, or by preventing her from going to work. Worse, she is also obliged to ask permission from him to do anything, go anywhere, or see anyone. There was a realization that these limitations are imposed by the abusive partner precisely to make the woman dependent upon him so that he may be able to maintain his dominant position. The problem thus lies, not with the woman who is entitled to a right to interact and socialize with other people, but with the man who merely releases his own insecurities and hostilities on the woman.

iii. Sharing of their experiences

The participants were asked to share about their personal experiences or that of anyone personally known to them regarding any act of violence against them or their children, what they did to fight such violence and whether they succeeded in ending the violence. A general observation is that most women participants were not very open about sharing their personal experiences. This may be due to the common belief that it is shameful to share such an experience with other people and that any incidence of domestic violence is better kept undisclosed. However, during the presentation when some women did in fact share about their personal experiences, most women actively participated by stating their comments and asking questions. This indicates that despite their seeming reluctance at first, they are aware and conscious about the advocacy of putting an end to VAW.

iv. How the barangay official can help

Participant barangay officials were asked how they may be able to provide assistance to women and children who are victims of violence. In this aspect, a general assessment would be that barangay officials are fairly aware of the incidence of domestic violence in their barangay, however, they still need to be trained more in the implementation of the Anti-VAWC Law. Some of them admitted that what usually happens is that when a complaint is brought to them, the dispute is often settled by compromise. The reason is that the woman, most of the time, is not willing to pursue any legal remedy anyway. In fact, what the woman wants is for the barangay official to only reprimand the abusive husband/partner. By pointing out this problem, the participants were made aware that a more effective way to put an end to VAW is to avail of the remedy provided by the law as settlement by compromise would only lead to a recurrence of the violence.

Conclusion

Aside from the need to further increase women’s awareness regarding the legal remedies available to them, there is a need to address, first and foremost, the many social, political and economic constraints that prevent women from making use of the Anti-VAWC Law. Without taking affirmative action on these aspects, these women may not have the power, or the willingness, to use the law to their own advantage.